Leadership Don’t Cost A Thing

Do you remember that JLo song, “Love Don’t Cost a Thing”? I wanted to bring that up because that’s the song I thought of when I wrote this blog, but the title doesn’t fit into the syllabic pattern of the song. Anyways…

The whole reason I bring up the song by Jennifer Lopez is because we live in a transactional world. And for me, personally, I have struggled with the feeling of needing to “pay” for what others give to me. I have this feeling, maybe guilt, that I’m not contributing enough to the relationship/friendship.

Thing is, when we lead others, it is NOT a transaction. We should not be asking, “I let you take a training class, now I need you to spend those extra hours doing this work.”

Leadership is a role where we CANNOT expect any sort of return other than supporting and watching others succeed.

Whether or not we lead as a manager or lead through influence, we have to be in a consistent state of giving and learning. This also requires us as leaders to focus on self-care so we do have the ability to lead, but that’s a different topic. Requiring a “payback” cheapens the relationship and changes it from unconditional to transactional.

Moving forward, I know I have to check myself when I receive and give to others, and be aware of my feelings to not turn my relationships into transactions.

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